Wednesday, June 01, 2005

Sooo... long time no post

I've been lazy.

The trasition from part time cdplus counter bitch to full time cdplus ass man has been a tiring one. It seems lately all I do is work. It may seem that way because all I do lately is work. I get up in the early morning (well, early for me anyway) and work until the early evening, at which I come home and proceed to be a lazy ass. Apparently my lazy ass is also a fat one, as a friend of mine (can I really call her a friend? hmmm) pointed out today. Granted, I'm pretty sure it was meant as some sort of weird compliment, but none-the-less, it was slightly distressing. Lately I have been attempting a diet, so hearing that was a little sad. Oh well. She meant well?

I have been neglecting both my online journals lately, so I decided now was as good a time as any to post. I still have yet to write about my birthday weekend (which was wonderful) and, even further back, I have yet to really write about my trip to BC all the way back in Feb! I should likely do that soon - and I still owe Marc my "swim" story. Maybe one day I'll get around to all that.

Today is not that day.

I just typed a huge paragraph about how I've been feeling lately. I then reminded myself that no one wants to hear it. I have learned over the past few days that the best way to keep the people around me happy and wanting to talk to me is to just shut my mouth about how I feel. It brings people down. No one wants to hear it because it makes them feel sad and they get frustrated that they can't cheer me up or force me to see the bright side - or get me to change the way I see things.

Imagine how it feels for me then. I would love to just be able to be happy about something and enjoy it, but my mind always looks for all the things that can go wrong. I wish I could change that, but I can't. It's the way I am. It's the way I've become. Get screwed over enough and that's what happens.

Oops, I said I wasn't going to talk about it.


Blogger Missy The Moo said...

it's ok if u wanna complain u should use blog to do it too! cause no one can interupt u!!!! YAaaaa!

6:57 PM  

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